Gentle Parenting And Why It’s Important To Us

When I tell people I choose to gentle parent Decklyn, I typically get some looks. People will often assume when they hear this that we either don’t discipline her at all or that she’ll grow up to be entitled, selfish, or demanding. I just don’t believe this idea to be true. So, I wanted to write a blog post all about why we chose this parenting style and how we’re learning along the way.

I want to first mention how I began learning about gentle parenting methods and why we thought this was the right choice for our family. The first time I ever even heard the words “gentle parenting” was on Milena Ciciotti’s vlogs. Milena is a vlogging mama of 2 on YouTube and shares a bunch of great information about raising kiddos. This isn’t the focus of all her content but I’d say it’s a pretty large part of why I keep returning to her channel.

Anyways, when Milena had her first child she spoke explicitly in a video about parenting styles she didn’t “subscribe” to. Just to name some examples…spanking, shouting, using the word “no”, etc. When I first watched her video, I was judgmental and confused. Some of what she was saying were things I agreed with but others were questionable.

After lots of research (and watching MANY more of Milena’s vlogs lol), I decided to start implementing these strategies in our own home.

Here are some of those:

- Not using the word “no” without an explanation or warning first.

- Not spanking or using loud tones when disciplining.

- Keep sharing to a minimum.

- Choosing Montessori and imagination based toys instead of electronic or battery powered devices.

- We don’t use the “cry it out” method and choose comfort over isolation.

- Letting her make a mess without consequences.

- Keeping “child proofing” to a minimum.

- Kneeling down to make eye contact when possible.

I can truly see the difference these parenting choices have made in Decklyn’s behavior over the last year. She seems to understand that although we are not equals (parent vs. child), we respect her and treat her like a human being. My hope is that these values will allow her to treat others the same way.

Do you feel like you implement these parenting styles in your own home? What do you do differently? I’d love to have an open discussion in the comments! No judgement zone here!